on being proud

I think about moments that my mom has been proud of us. Getting into college, learning to ride a bike, hitting our first homeruns, getting the lead in the school play, finally learning our times tables, getting married, having babies, etc. As I was "cleaning" the other day, I stumbled upon my baby book and found this picture.

First of all, my mom is a fox. Second of all, this is ME NOW. Holding her third baby, which is myself, while the other two are near. She's having to tell Steve (my Eliza) to be gentle with the baby, and she's probably asking Jack (my Avery) to get mom a burp cloth please! This is my mom doing what I do every day. You think of your mom a certain way. I don't think of her as having babies, like this picture shows, I think of her as the full of life dynamic teacher and doting grandma that she is today. Of course I know that she was in this stage before, the stage of babies, but I know her differently. 

So, being proud. I'm a very proud mom. I walk about town with my girls proudly. I push them in the double wide, and wear the baby on my chest with pride. I gladly accept compliments on how cute they are, and I smile when people say I have my hands full. I feel so unimportant when I'm walking without them, not that people need to feel important when they go walking or shopping, but when I have them with me, I walk a little taller. 

Now, Ivy. Sweet Ivy Marie. She really gets this proud mom thing in me going. She works so hard to do things that I know are difficult for her. She smiles the whole time while she wears her eye patch. She's trying to move her neck more and is relatively compliant with her therapy. Avery and Eliza met millstones with ease, and typical timeliness. Ivy has to work harder to meet those, but darn that kid, she does. She's 5 months old and has already taught me to work harder in things that are challenging in my life. This picture I took of her the other day and there are so many details to it that amaze me, and without boring details about her "conditions" this is a milestone in itself. And in Ivy fashion, a grin that could solve world peace. 

I felt so deeply proud of her in this moment. And truth be told, I'm writing this with tears streaming down my face, and one might think, "She's sitting in a bumbo? This is tear worthy?" Yes, it is. 

To my point, which there is one, my mom had proud moments like this with us. Little moments that in the perspective of our lives now seem like nothing, but I know my mom holds them near to her heart. As I will always hold this picture in a special place; my proud mom folder of my heart. The pride is not in myself, because it surpasses my understanding and ability what happens daily in my house with my girls; what they do, how they grow and develop. It comes down to this, I'm proud that I get to watch them and that I know them. That I'm fortunate enough to guide them on their journey, side by side (by side, by side...) And sweet Ivy's journey is just beginning and she is a fun and tender ride. 

And soon, these three little girls will be hitting all the proud mom moments like riding bikes, getting into college, and having babies of their own. Let's hope I'm not still blogging about it, because that would just be weird. 


1 comment:

emily rhodes said...

girl, you better still be blogging in 30 years. also, I still have not hit my first home run yet -- should I be worried? ps: I love you!

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