7.12.2009

think

I think about a lot of things. Always. There are many stations going at once in my brain. Some people call this ADD, and maybe it is. Most of the time, I like it. But sometimes my brain can't take it anymore. I have to shout it out. Or write it out. Here goes:

I sometimes look at pictures to remind myself that I have a wonderful life when I'm feeling down. I wish I thought of the gospel instead. I am married to a wonderful man and I struggle to be a perfect wife, which again, I should look to the gospel to know that I will fail him (hubs) and that he will still love me because he always will. I wish the orphanage in Sri Lanka wasn't ecumenical. I would love to spend time there with the girls sharing God's love with them, and I wonder if I'll ever return. I want to go to Morocco with Ken and teach. Or anywhere in the world where he could help train church leaders and I could teach English to kids. I would love to go to Africa. I wonder when we'll have kids. It's for things like that where I want to ask God, "When and how many?" But, that's not how things work, and let's be honest, who would really want that? I love teaching and currently I'm very inspired by the guys who started KIPP. My new school is pretty intense and I half excited and half nervous to start there in the fall. I never knew I would be a teacher, and I must say, I enjoy it a lot. I'm constantly challenged on many levels. I really like living in New Orleans. I was telling Ken tonight that I feel like it's this secret that I want everyone to know, but not to the point where moving here becomes trendy. Like when you find a great band and you are hesitant pass on the goodness, but when they do become popular, you're the first one to claim to have liked them "way back when, like before you even knew!" I like how I know New Orleans. How sweet peole live to close. I think our pastor, Ray is one of the greatest people I know. We went to a wedding last weekend and I told Ken, "let's hang out with Ray at the wedding," even though I see him multiple times in a week. He's infectious. He married us almost a year ago and I want him to baptize our kids one day. Marriage. Ken and I will celebrate one year August 2. And I say, "heck yes!" Went by really fast. I love Ken. He calms me, encourages me, loves me unconditionally, and makes me feel like a woman. It's not always easy, but even when it's hard, I love it. I wish I spent more time reading and less time facebooking. This is what is on my brain tonight. Now I will join my bubby who's been sleeping to 2 hours.

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